The Only Things That I Assume
Posted: Friday, September 18, 2009
by Terry Mitchell
http://commenterry.blogs.com
We have all heard the old saying about what assuming does to us. While that is pretty much true, I do believe it's safe, and even desirable, to make some assumptions. Here are some of the things that I assume on a regular basis:
1) Whenever I hear something hit the floor, I assume that I dropped it.
2) Whenever I hear the blare of car horn, I assume that I must have made a stupid mistake behind the wheel.
4) Whenever I hear a strange noise while driving, I assume that it's coming from my car.
5) Whenever I'm the first to finish a given task, I assume that I must have forgotten to do part of it.
6) Whenever I go to an agreed-upon meeting place and no one else is there, I assume that arrived too early, too late, or showed up the wrong location.
7) Whenever I pay for something at a store and get back less change than I expected, I assume that I am mistaken.
8) Whenever I pay for something at a store and get back more change than I expected, I assume that the clerk is mistaken.
9) Whenever my checking account balance is less than what I thought it was supposed to be, I assume that I miscalculated.
10) Whenever my checking account balance is more than what I thought it was supposed to be, I assume that the bank miscalculated.
11) Whenever I encounter a choice seat or parking space that is unoccupied, I assume that it is reserved for someone else.
12) Whenever I'm the first in line at a grocery store checkout, I assume that I failed to see the sign that said, "This line is closed."
13) Whenever I notice that I'm passing everyone else on the road, I assume that I'm speeding.
14) Whenever I notice that everyone else on the road is passing me, I assume that I'm driving too slowly.
15) Whenever a set of instructions sound too easy, I assume that I must not have read all of them.
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Top-level comments on this article: (2 total)Too good Terry, too good! This is classic. thanks for this humorous and insightful read!Edward, thanks for reading. I'm glad you liked it! This was obviously an attempt at some self-depricating humor, but in reality, one can't go wrong by practicing a little humility.
Hi Terry, Your article reflects much humility.
Metta.........eE., thanks for reading and commenting. Jesus taught us to put ourselves last and defer to others. I think this includes always assuming against ourselves and in favor of others. Sometimes you can avoid humiliation by practicing humility. Remember what the Bible says about not sitting down in the most presitgious seat at a public gathering? It's better (and less embarrassing) to take a lower seat and be told to move up than to take a higher one and be told to move down.
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